dialogues that i must remember

i had a workshop and came home near 6pm today.

found hubs in the kitchen and our conversation went like this:

let me warn u first, dont say that i did not. being a housewife aint easy!

i knew! that is why i said i needed a maid as well! "

thats not considered a housewife!

then i'll be the babysitter.

then you are becoming the tai-tai

-_______-

well, but deep inside i was elated because it meant that he knew housewife is not an easy job, as how this occupation is commonly portrayed.

nevertheless, at this very minute, i just wanna be me. i feel so freaking tired. :)

oh! another story that i need to immortalize here.

happened just last week in the car.

i admonished KJ for jumping out from his car seat while the father is driving.

he quickly sat down and wailed " dont be angry at me mommy. dont scold me. im saddd.... "

???? did he say he is sad???

instantly i apologized.

then, at night the father mocked me "so, how did u feel when your son did that in the afternoon?"

erm, i did not expect him to say that, but well, if he was really sad, i would feel bad. but i wasnt sure if he was faking it. heh

some truth about Relationship

i thought this is worth sharing.

should have posted this yesterday, in conjunction of Valentine's Day.

Anyway, enjoy. *it is a rather long post*

A friend wrote this, which I found the article made sense and practical

When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake. Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50%, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr./Miss. Right!

If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married, they'll say: "We're in love"; I believe this is the ..1 mistake people make when they date. Choosing a life partner should never be based on love. Though this may sound "not politically correct", there's a profound truth here.

Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again: "You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone"; You need a lot more!!!

Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner.

QUESTION ..1: Do we share a common life purpose?
Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: If you're married for 20 or 30 years, that's a long time to live with someone. What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together? You need to share something deeper and more meaningful. You need a common life purpose.

Two things can happen in a marriage:
(1) You can grow together, or
(2) You can grow apart.

50% of the people out there are growing apart. To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life!

Bottom line; marry someone who wants the same thing.

QUESTION ..2: Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?
This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis of having good communication is trust - i.e. trust that I won't get "punished"; or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings. Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to marry.


QUESTION ..3: Is he/she a mensch?
A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person. How can you test? Here are some suggestions. Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis? Are they serious about improving themselves? A teacher of mine defines a good person as "someone who is always striving to be good and do the right ";. So ask about your significant other: What do they do with their time? Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement.

There are essentially two types of people in the world:
(1) People who are dedicated to personal growth and
(2) people who are dedicated to seeking comfort.
Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walking down the aisle.

QUESTION ..4: How does he/she treat other people?
The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure.

Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they wrapped up in themselves and self- absorbed?

To measure this, think about the following: How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as waiters, bus boys, taxi drivers, etc.. How do they treat their parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude and appreciation?

If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them everything; can you do nearly as much for them? You can be sure that someone, who treats others poorly, will eventually treat you poorly as well.

QUESTION ..5: Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married?
Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to improve; them after they're married. As a colleague of mine puts it: "You can probably expect someone to change after marriage for the worse" If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them.

In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating; to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself trouble because you didn't do your homework.

Another perspective...

There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance.. It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships. Observe the relationships around you.

Pay attention...
Which ones lift and which ones lean?

Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?

Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill?

When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse?

Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or appreciate you?

The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you...the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.

An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye"; Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren't really that important.

Do you bring out the best in each other?

Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare and control?

What do you bring to the relationship?

Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain?

You can't take someone to the altar to alter them. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay.

If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life"; you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.

WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG IS:

1. TRUST

2. COMMUNICATION

3. INTIMACY

4. A SENSE OF HUMOR

5. SHARING TASKS

6. SOME GETAWAY TIME WITHOUT BUSINESS OR CHILDREN

7. DAILY EXCHANGES (meal, shared activity, hug, call, touch, notes, etc.)

8. SHARING COMMON GOALS AND INTERESTS

9. GIVING EACH OTHER SPACE TO GROW WITHOUT FEELING INSECURE

10. GIVING EACH OTHER A SENSE OF BELONGING AND ASSURANCES OF COMMITMENT

If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment withdrawal, abuse, neglect, and dishonesty; and pain will replace.


http://khata-jabor.blogspot.com/2010/07/golden-rules-for-finding-your-life.html

when are my 2 princes gonna get up?

love this photo :)

there is never equality at home, no matter how hard we try to equalize it :p

like for now, 10.25am, dearest kayjay is taking his morning nap, while dearest hubby is still sleeping! from last night. duh (him)

I've had my breakfast too!

:S

why do i need to sacrifice? why do i need to get up early, play with kayjay, drive to the market and buy some vege, come home and cook soup, feed kayjay his breakfast, line dry the clothes and put in another load of dirty laundry into the washing machine. I've done all these, and he still hasn't wake up.

well, we have talked about these before.

u see, i have to race to sleep at night when kj is asleep, if not i wouldn't be able to get up in the morning. that means no staying up at night for me. this is not my choice. as in, dear hub would say 'Oh u sleep early! so u wake up early and accompany kj lah'. he doesn't get it, does he? it is not that i want to sleep early, sometimes when i am engrossed in something online, i would stay up past the ghostly hours and YET, i still have to wake up together with kj. u see my point here? oh, kj usually wakes up at 6 -7am.

this is just one teeny example of what happens in our household ;)

right, next up,

im blogging using an iMac! wheeee...

chewww, big deal. well, when we received the package from DHL, we were darn excited! the pleasure wears off quite quickly after that. :S

the simplicity of the machine,

all in a box

jeng jeng,

gave him the honour to fix it

it is his Early Birthday Gift after all

*wink*

kiss kiss kj, kiss kiss

HaPPY second anniversary

thank you so much for:

your love,

your cheekiness,

goofiness,

cheering me up,

standing me up,

cursing together with me,

bitching together with me,

enduring my nags,

enraging me,

then admitting *defeats,

giving me Kayjay,
and hopefully more beautiful children :p,



withstanding my poor cooking skill,
stomach my unsuccessful muffins/cookies,

scrubbed my burnt pot,

telling me that im beautiful (not everyday) occasionally,

live through my laziness,

sharing food with me,
donating food that u dislike to me,

ignoring me when you are watching football, :p

bringing me all the way to Hummingbird bakery just for red velvet,

thank you does not do justice

we have come a long way,
through thick and thin,

we are still learning about one another,
i still think i can drive better than you,
my heart aches when you asked for my permission to provoke kayjay,

above all that,

my love for you is no less

it is only the second year of our marriage.

i'm not greedy.
not asking for more.
but just another year.
and another year,
and another year,
and another...
and another.......

promises made on such events are not to be taken lightly,
hence,
i'll be waiting! HAHA!

*oh sharks! what happened to my that gladiator sandal? brown? since when did i own it? man!*
sad!

the day of the month

today is the day,
that the water dam broke.
i cried.
not cry, like really CRY OUT LOUD. no sobbings involved.
just spillage.
-_-''''

i just dont feel comfortable.
i feel very very VERY lethargic.
at 4pm, my eyes were already spinning.
the moment it rang 5pm, i was one of the first few to queue in front of the punch card machine.

i always carry down my workbag from the car but today is one exceptional day.
never did i leave it in the car. very RARE.
dear hb didnt help me to bring down. this is not the first time we argued about this.
he would just speed away,
meeting his love and other lovers in the field.

a thought played in my mind.
what happens if he cannot part with this lifestyle for the rest of his life?
what would become of me? and my son? and my future children?
what lies ahead?
frightening, isnt it?
is he childish?
or am i the childish one having this thought?

i cant sleep.
what should i do?
it is 6pm.
worked up some muscles and went out to watch kayjay for a wee while.
came back into the house,
remembered that ive marinated chicken yesterday or was it day before yesterday?
on days like this, i could potentially cause a burnt.
but i told myself, to beware!
so i place the pot of marinated chickens on the stove , put it on medium lowish fire.
came back in to the room and surf the net.

my eyes kept on diverting to the clock, checking the time.
it was almost 7pm, dear hb is coming home.
i should bath before he comes home.
dragged a while more before i stand up,
i changed my mind.
i should cook the rice first.
the moment i fling open the door,
i KNEW it!
the entire house was smoggy!

i turned off the gas.
came back to the room.
that was it surged and leaked.

it is 7.41pm now.
before he went out this evening,
he said he would come home at 7pm and prepare the dinner by 7.30pm.
now 7.42pm.
i havent eaten.
and i couldnt bring the little one home yet.
would i be happy?

i would usually cook and when he comes back,
we would quickly eat.
or if im hungry, i would eat first.
and by 7.30pm,
i would want to bring kayjay home already.

7.43pm

im still here.
u should know what is happening outside.
dinner is still not ready.

i dont feel bad anymore for not preparing meals. be it breakfast, lunch or dinner.

we should all help out.

i wont pile all the responsibility on my back anymore.

guys should help out.

k,not checking what ive typed.
this is to give an insight on married life.

for instance, this is what i usually serve for dinner. simple meal - with 2 dishes. at most, 3 dishes and i would call that a luxury :)

kayjay has changed

just got back from peninsular. balik kampung for about 10 days. it was tiring, travelling from KL up north to ipoh and penang and kedah. we flew from a/star back to KK.

now that we are back in KK, kj seems different. crying/whimpering every now and then.

im maidless and im so so thankful that hub did the entire house yesterday [saturday]. i wanted to help out. it was the other way round. hub is suppose to help me out but instead he did everything. from bedroom to the kitchen, to the living room and the laundry area, as well as the bathroom. my. i did not expect kayjay to be this difficult. i wanted to put him to sleep so that i can quickly get the housework done BUT he was actually nursing for comfort! good lord! so the moment i un-latched, he whimpered. sigh.

it made me think, if it is time for me to give up? to stop nursing? there are many reasons that i can give.

i'll write again.

as we progress

kayjay has his milestone. so do we, the two of us :)

1 year has passed.

i know this will be interesting, cause it is more relevant to most of my dear friends who are not married yet. too much of kayjay bores them.

okay okay

1. im pleased that he helps to do the dishes now.

before : i'd walked into the kitchen with used utensils lying around the sink

after: CLEAR! no un-used utensils! never underestimate these little gestures. u could cook cheerfully when u walk into the kitchen and u can jump straight to the preparation of food. rather than needing to wash and clean up the work area first!

im no doubt SATISFIED! after ngam ngam ngam for so long! the day has arrived! :)

when i was anticipating to wash the dishes when i come home from work, that was when i started to notice that the dishes were all washed.

i told him that he should wash the dishes after using. dont wait for me to do it. if i am already there at the sink washing, then if he has finished eaten, i could wash.

irks me when he came home for lunch alone, eat and just leave the utensils beside the sink. why want to wait for me?

firstly, i would appreciate if u could help me to soak the utensils.

secondly, i am also working, as hard as u (him). same time, same job.

thirdly, we dont have a maid.

you love me? do it. please help out.

wife = maid
?

dont overlooked all these chores, never underestimate what they can DO to a relationship :p *laughs*

all of us are spoilt. most of us are i believe, so all these menial jobs are done by our dearest mother or honoured maid. but now your wife is the one doing it. so please help out if can, everyone is capable. we are living in a new generation.


next!

wanna piss me off? darn easy

WAKE UP LATE and there you go!

getting up at 7.15am will put me in distress!

try getting up at 7.20am, please expect a volcano!

7.10am is the latest that i can take!

work starts at 8am, for god's sake!

i need him to wake up early is because it would affect me. ive already tried to get up EARLIER so that i can manage everything on my own, but, well, it works sometimes, but sometimes cant. BECAUSE? it depends on kayjay. he needs to be nursed once he gets up.

there was one period where i wake up at 5.30am. then now i dont have much to do, so i get up at 6am or latest 6.30am.

i would sometimes cook in the morning. most of the time fried rice.

dont know how to say. there are just many things to be taken care of.

so like today, we were late and he didnt bring up my workbag into the car. punchcard is in my bag. grh!
and i forgot to put on my sunblock! add on to the anger! bah!

also! i cant stand it when he doesnt COVER the dishes /marinades when he puts them in the fridge! ewwww!!

do u need to TEACH such things?

only guys do that!

it is EWW because u do not know what is brewing in air of the fridge!

k, that should be all.

it is just great that ive taken time off, 3 hours today to come home to blog!

cool?

haha!

went to the market for 1 hour and prepare food for 1 and the remaining 1 here. 'i have nothing to say'

:D

cheers!

are u ready for this?

shit, dont think i can post it in time in conjunction with the DATE

im late by few minutes (by the time i finish posting the entire entry)

anyway,

if u can make up the puzzles on the cupcakes,

.........

oh, and there were 25 of them

i ate 3 when i was transporting the cakes home cause i was too hungry

i was just brooding over the fact that we couldnt even make it through the 1st on a happier note

dont understand?

it means we didnt go through the day in good spirits

we HAD to argue the night before

sigh

then,

he tried to make it up today after work

drove straight to town,

planned to bring me to Nishiki, a jap restaurant

unfortunately, it wasnt opened till 6.30pm

and we were there before 5.30pm

hence we decided to give LITTLE ITALY a try

if uve been to kota kinabalu,

u'll know how people rave about this restaurant

which i dont fancy!

ugh!

we thought we should give it another chance

but...

bah!

no way im going there again!

italiannies rates better than this over-rated restaurant!

my salmone

salmon was not fresh!

carbonara was soso

we had a rather good time catching up after not talking since last night

his grilled chicken

salmon pizza

salty

ewww

a card which he claimed expressed everything, all his thoughts

i'll reveal the present next time

what i'd like to share now is...

the night had to end bitterly

we came home and i brought the cupcakes into the room

he was elated...

then he brought the cakes out to the living room as i told him to share with the rest

they wanted to go out for dinner first so we left the cakes untouched

did our stuff and my migraine got worse

so after preparing my things,

i stood at the doorway and said " i'll eat the cupcake and im ready for bed"

he said ok and continue surfing the net

hence i sat outside and ate one cake

then another

then i got into the room,

brushed my teeth,

and extorted " how come u didnt go out and eat the cake with me"

he looked a little astonished

"i thought u said u wanted to eat one cake and go to sleep"

"yes, but what is the point of eating it alone?"

do u guys see my point?

do i need further elaboration?

am i too demanding?

yes, it was dump of me to expect or to assume u will go out and sample the cake with me

i thought u should try the cake and give me the feedback?

to tell me if the cake is delicious?

i am speechless

what kind of a celebration?

i mean, how do u celebrate..say a birthday for a friend?

do u buy her/him a cake and then shove it to them and thats it?

u do your own things after that?

u ignore him/her and let her eat it herself?

or was it my mistake that i should actually tell him to go out and try the cakes WITH ME?

i slept right after that and now that im awake to do some chores,

eg washing the diaper, rinse my pump, fill up water into bottles,

i went to check on the cupcakes,

they were untouched

*twist into a knot*

in total, ive eaten 5 and i kept on avoiding eating those with the letters

:(

i didnt want to break the words

:(

overlooked

souvenirs from her highness!

4 boxes of ferrero

simply gifts like this bring lotsa joy to us

the ferrero is for hb

cote d'or is for me

=)

she came for 3 days 2 nights (weekend)

she taught me how to make 'loh mai gai'

hb likes to eat and it really annoys me each time he orders it outside EVEN when he knows they suck! thats number 1. number 2, it is overpriced

hence now i can make my own loh mai gai and he has no reason to order outside :p

next,

there are backlog of events for me to report

kj is 7 mths old

firstly, KJ can sit unsupported, well, not exactly upright but it was still ..something to be lauded :p

secondly, he begins to sleep with his chest on the bed, they call it 'meniarap'

if only he sleeps this way few months earlier, then his head would be shaped nicely. the back os his head/skull is flat now :(

anyway, just 2 weeks ago he starts to sleep one sided and then next, he flipped over and sleep

thirdly, it has been A WEEK that he wakes up in the middle of the night. he lifts up his head(cause he sleeps like a tortoise) and make grunt with his eyes closed.

think hez having nightmare :( poor kid

hb wants to put him on the bed with us but i do not encourage co-sleeping cause it is dangerous. why? can read about it online, the danger of SIDS :)

anyway, we got him a bed for a reason, so that he can sleep independently.

next,

he can make more noise these days!

just over the weekend, he can lalalalala... he is asking us to carry him! :) omg! speaking of him now makes me miss him

im blogging away at work, tdm :p

im looking forward to this coming weekend! it is raya hols and it is the first time we are going for a short holiday as a family!

cant express how excited i am!

not to mention a little nevous

cause i need to be well prepared, as we'll be travelling with KJ

the trips home to ipoh/kedah is not counted cause u have families there, hence ure not afraid if u are short of any belongings

hence im already starting to make a list of items to bring

pray that it would be a smooth journey

oh, i forgot to mention that we will be driving all the way to sandakan from kota kinabalu!

that would take an approximate of 4 hours~

---------------------------

another joy that i'd like to share~

a present for us~

yay! makes like so much more exciting! ahhaha

why?

i can buy more food and prepare them ahead of time. marinade and cook them and store them in the fridge so that we can have a fuss-free dinner on weekdays

can make jelly

can buy bags of fruits

hb can make cold drinks~

can store more of kj's ebm (expressed breast milk) in a odour-free space

see? benefits everyone!

another rule to remember:

MUST get BIG FRIDGE! even when u have 3 people in a household, or two

trust me!

another rule that ive learnt before this is,

MUST get GOOD mattress!

obviously we cant afford rm10 000 dunlopillo

but this current local made one seems fine

we've learnt our lessons and hence i'd like to share them!

we bought a fridge, one door fridge, but it is clearly insufficient

as for the mattress, i didnt look far at that juncture. i asked hb to get a cheap one :p haih... ended up wasting more money as we had to buy another mattress rm2k - rm3 cant remember

the first one was made of foam and it was rm400-500. blerhh...my mistake

the fridge was his mistake

:p

so 1-1

haha

low energy

i hope readers here wont judge him by my grouses as u need to know me, i bla and nag and whine and wail but that doesnt make him bad. many times i'd think twice if i can relate or make a fuss in here but i relented and thought that it would be good to share them here so that u guys can learn from the mistakes that we have made. i HOPE readers here are matured enough and my blog here would not mars his image.

right, back to my complains :p

u know how disgusting it is to find your hubby using your shower scrub to SCRUB his legs after football practice? imagine the sand and dirt and soils trapped between the hairs in the leg??? are u ewwwing?

yikes! why didnt he tell u earlier that he needs one scrub so that u can buy one for him? how can he assume he can just use whatever he sees in the bathroom? EWWWWWWW!!!

ok. now about KJ:)

he is so cute. im not blowing my own trumpet, he is cute to me! and i love him loads.

he hates blanket. why do i know? i covered him with a blanket when he was partially asleep. well, i thought he was asleep but i guess not? cause when i covered him with a blanket (towel), he kicks them away. alright, he doesnt kick it away. what he did was he literally lifts up both his legs then the blanket will dropped on his tummy, revealing his chummy legs. maybe it was by chance that he did so? i tried covering again and he did it again. consecutively 3 times he lifted up his legs and it was enough to make my heart squeeze.

and instances like this?

it made melts away my heart

knowing that he is able to do this helps to relieve a lot of the tension on my shoulder

because when he baths KJ,

i could do a lot of other things

rather than wait for me on every single thing!

thanks honey

ding dong bell

no vera wang wedding gown for me

nor jimmy choo wedding heel

but im contented, rather, with my wedding band.

the LOVE ring is engraved with the date of our chinese wedding 20.09.2009, instead of our registration date.

looking for wedding heels could be a pain in the arse. we searched everywhere and ended with up a silver lacy stuart weitzman. (cant find a pic of my shoe, will add in at a later date)

found it!

i goggled it

shoes is only like 1% of the component of a wedding and yet i spent ample time looking for one that i love.

studio photos werent that important to me then.

photographers/videographer IS important on the wedding day but my hb is too poor to hire them so i did not have any. :)

oh well, the things that i could take charge of at that juncture....

let bygones be bygones..

allow me to relate one funny incident!

i cried on the day of my wedding day!

the make up for the morning session was hideous so i cried the moment i went home. she painted my face and did my hair in her studio. who is she? one so-called hot aunty/hairdresser, a popular hairdresser in a small town, what was i thinking? sigh.

i hope it does not spell bad luck :p

thats all about my wedding :p

oh, and i'll upload wedding photos in fb, but will only release on request, else they will be restricted :p

cause i dont want random strangers to view sesuka hati.

sorry, hope u people would understand.

i think the photos are gross, and sometimes u dont know who adds you in fb these days. although i do try to ignore those whom i cant associate with.

bye guys

ive resurfaced

sighhhhhhh

has been a really really long time since i ditched u dear blogspot!

it was really difficult not speaking to u for such a LONG TIME!

anyway, i would be real random this time, hence it would be quite messy.

#1:

i cant seem to cope with my current life. it is too demanding and hectic, till im having migraine for this entire week. it is pcm pcm pcm. what other choice do i have? like now, the migraine residue is still dancing in my head.

#2:

ive hired a maid, she comes once a week and she is of tremendous help i kid u not! i do not have to worry about the big baby not having his clothes pressed on monday! what i did last time was i would wake up early, about 6 am and will iron one or two. i used to jump on hb to sweep and mop the floor last time :p cause i was pregnant , how do u expect me to half-bend and do the chore? :p

yet now i do not have to worry about this anymore. however, cleaning the house ONCE A WEEK is insufficient. we cannot afford to hire her more than once a week, hence we have to close one eye and live in a semi-clean environment.

in order to save $, we try to eat in as well, which means more work for me. right after work, i'll rush to the kitchen and start to wash the rice, chop meat, wash vegge etc etc etc. when im done, or while waiting for the things to cook, i'll dash to our bedroom and fold the clothes. i would usually keep the clothes during lunch time (i go home during lunch hour) so that the clothes wouldnt be wet/cold since it rains most of the afternoon. after im done with the clothes, i'll bath. after that, the food would be ready. if hb doesnt go for football, we'll either bring KJ over from the nanny or we'll eat and then bring him home.

if hb goes for football, i'll bring KJ home first.

but there is a change last month.

i got mad with the system, so i ate first and bring KJ home.

so by the time im done with dinner and KJ is home with me, i'll try to give my full attention to KJ. although i would sometimes stray away from him (come online for a while), i would still try to make it up to him by singing and talking.

im not a good talker. i cant talk to him. i am not used to pouring out my heart to teddy bears or anything like that. whats more is that i dont even feel like talking when im left with 10% of energy.

why do i feel like i owed it to him to talk and sing and play with him? because i feel guilty for not spending the day with him.

crazy right?

#3:

my hp is not that important to me anymore. i can go out without my cellphone, or my purse. when we need to go out, i would need to remember to carry his diapers, extra shirts, and cloths. obviously i will not forget my baby when i go out :p so i never leave him alone at home. hardly.

sometimes when he wakes up early in the morning in the weekends, i would bring him together with me to the market! :) he enjoys it since he is a kay-poh-chi! :)) he loves to look around and explore things

#4:

something needs to be done about my situation now. i need to rope hb into the team, to serve the baby and ourselves. im not a supermother or a superhousewife :(

hence, he does most of the pot or wok cleaning and i'll try to arrange things so that he (hb) can chip in. such as i'll throw the clothes into the washing machine in the evening so that he can hang them at night before he goes to sleep. i'll sometimes transfer them out to the front of the house when i wake up the next day, to get sunlight and prevent them from getting musty.

sometimes is i fail to do the laundry in time for him to dry them, i would dry them myself when i get up in the morning, before i go to work.

he would also cook when im not in the mood :p my recipes are limited. when i was pregnant, my browser is flooded with recipes but NOW! is all about BABY! i spent so much time searching and reading about baby stuff. every little thing needs to be goggled. heck! kiasu mother! read until my eyes want to pop out sometimes!

now im reading about BABY ON SOLIDS!

because KJ will be eating solids in 2 weeks time! i would be lying if i tell you i am not excited!

oh oh! and hb said im mad when i befriended mothers online! :D

i even went to their houses! :))))

the power or motherhood!

you will go all out for your baby!

there is another excitement! im excited to have another baby!

ahahahhaahha

i so want to have more! but sigh. we cant afford it. plus the environment and everything else doesnt favour another family member so i'll jsut have to wait. :)

i missed those times when i can blog hop!

hence im really outdated

hope my dear friends are doing well

a year has passed

wanted to say times pass with a blink of an eye.

has been a year after our registration.

i wouldnt want to say happy anniversary, sounds lame.

wanted to upload pics but oh well, not in the mood. havent been feeling well these days so i'd rather take the time so sleep.

sigh. its quite sad though.

pcm pcm almost every day.

im such a lousy mother. i ought to note down KJ's development so that we can refer to them at a later date.

right, i shall hit the pillow first.

hope to be back soon.

ps: i labeled this post under celebration but it wasnt a celebration for us though. there are just too many celebrations.

something is missing, i should tag this post under something else, but i cant of what it is now. hmm...